While I fought to control the process of personal change, I struggled. We can continue to be General Manager of the universe, holding on tight and micromanaging what is no longer working for us, or we can soften and surrender to something exquisitely more aligned to our passion and purpose. The choice is ours, but it isn’t always easy to see our options that clearly.

A decade ago, my life featured the nature of unrest that society considers acceptable. I had achieved the milestones regarded as the prerequisites of a successful life; a raft of qualifications, a career with a decent salary, a mortgage, an annual holiday, a fun circle of friends and I was living contentedly enough with my long-term partner. But it just didn’t feel right. I was starting to question is this all there is? When I projected my life forward on this trajectory, I didn’t like what I saw. I was seeking answers, but I didn’t know what questions to ask.

When the student is ready the teacher appears as the saying goes. Having tried to change the things that weren’t right for me using strategies that had previously worked, I found myself stuck and spinning my wheels. I turned to sky in exasperation and said ‘OK, I’m listening; what am I missing? What do I need to do to create an existence that feels exciting to get out of bed for? How can I experience joy and ease and still lead a successful life?’

I had no idea what I was asking for. The aspects of my life that weren’t working were complex and inter-related; probably the reason why I hadn’t been able to change them myself. If I fixed one thing, another would falter. If I changed this element, it would impact somewhere else. Everywhere I turned it felt like I was faced with a closed door. I wrote lists and journaled, vision boarded and questioned, signed up for programmes, read avidly and spoke to anyone that would listen about what I wanted to achieve. More often than not I was met with blank stares from well-meaning friends who wondered why I was so restless.

As if by magic my life began to unravel. With hindsight, it was exactly what was needed, but it was a relentless period of profound personal change. I was made redundant from my salaried position, my partner of ten years left, and I found out I was pregnant with our first child. It was the start of an extraordinary chain of events that would bring me up close and personal with every habit and belief that had been holding me back. I didn’t feel like I’d asked for all this to happen, but it transpired that I was experiencing the perfect conditions to receive everything I had wished for.

The changes that appeared to be outside of my control heralded the start of my journey of entrepreneurship, connecting to my inner wisdom, finding my purpose and crystallising the strategies and approaches that would serve my future clients. Change that moves us towards our hearts desires is not always easy, but it’s always worthwhile. Spirit knows the way and we are loved more than we can ever know. Our job is to trust and surrender, to follow what feels good, to deeply examine our personal truth, to learn from the lessons we are presented and to live a life of aligned service. The adventure that lies ahead is more exciting and life-affirming than we can ever imagine.

You’ve got this.


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