Each week in The Wisdom of Change blog series, I share the original artwork and unpack the insights and meaning behind one of the 44 cards in The Wisdom of Change oracle deck.
This week’s card is 29 Your Tribe
Before I understood what it takes to create change for the better, I often felt like an outsider. Even my closest friends didn’t get it when I said I wanted something bigger, better or different from what I already had. I would try to describe my sense of unrest and attempt to articulate what I thought I was missing, but it was difficult to pinpoint because I didn’t even know what I was looking for. To my peer group looking in, it wasn’t as though my life looked disastrous. Why would you bother to do that? I would be asked. What are you worrying about that for? they would question.
I wondered if I was missing something fundamental about the way I viewed life.
Was I crazy to feel the way I did?
Was I ungrateful or unrealistic to want more?
Feeling dispirited and misunderstood only made me act in ever stranger ways. I would have unsatisfying conversations trying to explore ideas that other people couldn’t fathom. I would end up in explosive arguments with my partner who would conclude that my unrest must be his fault. I would concern my parents who just wanted me to be happy and didn’t know how to help. None of this felt emotionally safe. I was exhibiting unskilled behaviour with no idea how to navigate my experience.
Unbeknownst to me at that time I was seeking my tribe.
Understanding the importance of finding my tribe dawned on me when I stumbled across the perfect coach for that part of my journey. I had been searching for answers when I didn’t even know what questions to ask. I couldn’t articulate what I needed because I hadn’t found it yet. As the saying goes ‘when the student is ready the teacher appears’ and my seeking led me to my first coach of a spiritual nature. As soon as I found her, I just knew I had to work with her. It wasn’t logical, it was a feeling in my entire body that this person and what she was offering held the key to the door I couldn’t find.
Looking back, it was no surprise that in her group programme I found other women seeking insights and answers too. This courageous coach had overcome her own stories and followed her calling to create an experience to guide women just like me. I wasn’t alone anymore. I met other women who were also destined for jobs that hadn’t been created yet; who felt confused that they couldn’t adequately describe what they did or how they intended to be the change they wanted to see in the world.
I no longer felt crazy. I didn’t feel isolated in my search for new information. I gained new vocabulary to describe feelings and ideas, processes and concepts. I had women around me who knew how to support me, to unconditionally love me and to hold my dreams dear for me when I had temporarily forgotten them. In this way I learnt how to support others and the foundations of my practice were established. The building blocks of how I would create programmes and experiences for future clients began to manifest for me and I honed them over time….
And all because I found my tribe.
Whether you need to find your tribe or create your own, it’s one of the most powerful ways to support your onward journey. If you feel alone and you can’t pinpoint why, don’t despair. I can guarantee you are not the only one feeling this way. The perfect peers are out there waiting for you to join them. We find our people when we are brave enough to voice our dreams and desires; when we get honest about what we don’t know, what needs we have unmet and when we feel most vulnerable and exposed.
If you don’t know where to start to look and you need someone to talk it through, get in touch and I’ll help you get off the starting block in your quest.
You’ve got this.
I hope you’ve enjoyed this week’s connection to your inner wisdom.
As always, I’d love to hear your comments below.